4

August

This Just In… Packers’ Mason Crosby Finds the Answer to His Problems

After several years and much hard work, the Green Bay Packers and Mason Crosby today found the answer to his kicking problems – no defense. Yes, it seems that with no rush, Crosby is just fine, thank you.

Without a rush, Crosby was able to go five for five in field goals attempts at Tuesday night’s practice. When the Packers went to their full-team two minute drills, Crosby was given the opportunity to “win the game” with a last second 39 yard field goal. Of course, he missed.

Sadly, that wasn’t the shocking part. What ensued is fairly incredible. The Packers allowed Crosby to line up and take the kick again, but this time with NO DEFENSE. And of course, Crosby makes it.

Believe it or not, I’m not here to kill Mason Crosby. He’s certainly trying his best (we hope). No, I’m here to kill the Packers’ coaching staff and how they have handled Crosby. They have pandered to Crosby like he’s their supermodel girlfriend. Anything he wants. Anyway he wants it. No competition. Nobody to push his sorry ass and make him fight for his job.

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4

March

One Solution to the Packers Punting Situation; Bring Home the Turk

I don’t have to tell you how bad the Green Bay Packers’ punting game was in 2009. Still, Jeremy Kapinos did a better job than Derrick Frost, whom the Packers infamously kept in favor of Jon Ryan in 2008.  Unfortunately, Kapinos was last or close to last in the NFL in almost every punting category in 2009.

I don’t think it’s necessary to throw too many statistics at you in this case, so I’ll just give you a few quick ones:

The only category where Kapinos was not awful, but simply mediocre, was punting average, where Kapinos’ 43.8 gross yds per kick average placed him 16th in the NFL. Of course, we all know it’s net yards per kick average that counts most. Kapinos was dead last in the league in that category. Equally important, Kapinos was 31st in the NFL in punts inside the 20, had the second-most touchbacks, and was dead last (a recurring theme) in punts fair caught.

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